Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Too Drunk To Dream

Another fine drinking song for y'all today.

I've long maintained that Stephen Merritt of Magnetic Fields is a Country musician. If Hank Williams had teamed up with Cole Porter, that is. The Cole Porter comparison has been used ad nauseum when describing Merritt, and it's an apt comparison, but too often is overlooked the Country and Western underpinnings of his songs, both in lyrical content and construction, and in the tone and arrangement of the music, whether done on a shitty keyboard in his bedroom or with a full backing band, as in recent years. Look no further than the album "The Charm Of The Highway Strip"
for the best proof of Merritt's Country cred.

On their new album, "Distortion", The Magnetic Fields has produced one of the finest drinking songs in years, and, while it's still quite early, maybe the best single of the year. "Too Drunk To Dream" will sit easily on your playlist next to "There's A Tear In My Beer" and "Misery and Gin". If this had been released a year ago, it would easily have made our Top 100 Drinking Songs list. It's that good. Check out the lyrics:

Sober, life is a prison
Shit face, it is a blessing
Sober, nobody wants you
Shitfaced, they're all undressed
Sober, it's ever darker
Shitfaced, the moon is nearer
Sober, you're old and ugly
Shitfaced, who needs a mirror?
Sober, you're a cromagnum
Shitfaced, you're very clever
Sober, you never should be
Shitfaced, now and forever!

I gotta get too drunk to dream
'cause dreaming only makes me blue
i gotta get too drunk to dream
because i only dream of you

i gotta get too pissed to miss you
or i'll never get to sleep
i gotta drink wine not to pine for you
and god knows that ain't cheap

i know you think i'm insane
i know it's not appealing
but til i'm feeling no pain
guess what i'll be feeling?

I gotta get too fried to cry,
or i'll be crying all night long
i gotta get too high to sigh
oh my god where did i go wrong?

So why do i get plastered?
and why am i so lonely?
it's you, you heartless bastard
you're my one and only!

i gotta get too pissed to miss you
or i'll never get to sleep
i gotta drink wine not to pine for you
and god knows that ain't cheap
and god knows that ain't cheap!

Yep. Makes me wanna crack one open.


The Magnetic Fields: Too Drunk To Dream (mp3)

The Magnetic Fields: Love Is Like A Bottle Of Gin (mp3)

Please support your local liquor store and/or grizzled moonshiner.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Crooning In Yer Beer

Well, never let it be said we ain't fair here at the Barstool Mountain. Sure, we're gonna have us plenty of that there Country and Blues, more than a fair share one might argue. But we're concerned with the entire breadth of great drinking songs, and it seems to us that pretty much any genre can stake a claim to having a decent amount of classic boozers. So we're gonna step away from the Country and Blues for the next couple of posts. Don't fret, though, all will be well (or top shelf, if you prefer, and your budget can accommodate). We're here for you, and your sudsy needs.

So, a little something for the garage punks.

The New Bomb Turks were Columbus, Ohio's greatest band (we love our broad pronouncements) for a period of years in the 90's(with apologies to Gaunt, Scrawl, The Thomas Jeffeson Slave Apartments). Buzzsaw trash guitar, two minutes and done songs, and the snottiest Midwest vocals this side of Great Plains. The kind of band Crypt and Sympathy for The Record Industry wet themselves over. They even recorded a couple of songs with Thee Billy Childish. Live, they were a sweaty mess of boozed-up rock'n'roll.

Here's one of our favorite "night in the gutter" drinking songs. And for us older folks, we've got an "alternate" version where the lyrics are a tad more decipherable.

Yeghes da!

New Bomb Turks: Crying In The Beer Of A Drunk Man (mp3)

New Bomb Turks: Croonin' In The Beer Of A Drunk Man (mp3)


Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Yesterday's Wine

George Jones. Do I really need to say more? This is the man who drove his lawn mower to the liquor store because his wife hid the keys to his car so he wouldn't, well, drive to the liquor store. That's dedication, my friends.

'Course, old George is a Country legend whose range runs far and wide topically. And we give all due respect to The Possum. But this is Barstool Mountain, so we're interested in his more consumptive nature.

Jones placed 3 songs on the Top 100 Drinking Songs list ("White Lightning", "If Drinking Don't Kill Me..", and "The King Is Gone"). Since this round is, as always, on the house, we're gonna pour you a few more shots of George Jones inebriation to go along with your chasers. Or call it a Little Kings 8-pack.


George Jones: White Lightning (mp3)

George Jones: If Drinking Don't Kill Me (Her Memory Will) (mp3)

George Jones: The King Is Gone (mp3)

George Jones: Tennessee Whiskey (mp3)

George Jones: Yesterday's Wine (mp3)

George Jones: Bartender's Blues (mp3)

George Jones: Drive Me To Drink (mp3)

George Jones w/Merle Haggard: Must've Been Drunk (mp3)

Please support your local John Deere retailer. You never know when that tractor may come in handy.